::i have magic powers::

...is the title of the sam brown picture i have posted in my cubicle. sadly, it's in black & white. right now if i tried to print that from home, everything would be shades of pink: i am out of blue & yellow. i'll bet THAT would be interesting. one of these days i'll stop being so lazy.

i think i am recovered from whatever suddenly snuck up on me last week. i have been made inordinately aware of my heartbeat though. as a result, i startle myself at the least bit of inconsistency in rhythm.

on the more pensive side....
josh's sweet aunt is ill with cancer, which has progressed more rapidly than expected. there's nothing like the threat of death to wake you up to reality. we are all going to die. i am in no way making light of the current family goings-on; but this is where my thinking stems from. death is my least favorite subject. there were times i thought i didn't want to exist, but those were temporary instances in my late teens. maturity does wonders for perspective. as does a healthy dose of the Bible. i used to be afraid of death, too. in fact, some fears rear their ugly head time and again. why? because this is it. our one and only chance. make it a good one. and suddenly a college degree doesn't seem as important if you're doing something that makes you happy. i am happy now, i stinkin' love this job. however i think i still want to be a teacher. in some ways, i already am because of teaching sunday school. therefore, the balance is there & i don't feel so depressed about not pursuing my education. high school really can lie to you sometimes. i have done quite well in the work force with my instinctive self-motivation without a bachelor's. contentedness has settled in and i think i will stew on this for a while.

happy thanksgiving & God bless you.